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The Allure of Self-Hatred

One of my primary missions is to help women wake-up and live their truest, most fulfilling lives.
Now, with that said, it can be a damn challenge to do “the work” around waking up.

We are so programmed to believe that the external world will bring us the pain relief we seek that we keep trying the “thing” over and over again and truly believe we will get different results.

This reminds me of several of my clients who literally detest their bodies.  They have been let down in there pursuit of happiness (read:  love, connection, inner peace) through getting their bodies to look a certain way.

This self-hatred is sooooo compelling.

Media tells us it’s real, our families and friends often have similar beliefs about themselves.  We often “bond” with other women around body-hatred and “plans” for change.  We can find co-signers for this self-hatred bullshit everywhere we look.

But think for a second.  You have lived decades with this thought pattern.

  • Has it worked so far?
  • Have you found deep, lasting inner peace and self-love from your quest for the “right” body?
  • Have you had loving, connected romantic relationships that resulted from this self-hatred?
Susan Hyatt says, “dieting is one of the #1 ways women distract themselves.”
Why do we distract ourselves?
Even though the self-hatred hurts, it is an excellent distraction from being present with ourselves and our true feelings.
What I have found is this: (see if you relate)
1.  You have been consumed, for so long, with the fantasy that this ‘other’ body (person, place, thing) will be the answer to your pain, you’ve forgotten that the true solution is spiritual and internal.
2.  You don’t believe you have value/identity beyond what you look like and what you believe people think of you. You think your looks and your control over your body are your one chance at being loved.
3.  You are uncomfortable with the feelings that might be underneath the constant obsession with weight loss, what you consume, how much you did or didn’t exercise.

Letting Go

Y’all, I’m not going to lie . . . giving up the fantasy that, ” . . . someday I will look ‘right,'” can be a scary surrender.
But what’s underneath is so fulfilling and REAL.
Remember:  You are here to remember your goodness and to help others remember theirs.
When you let go of the obsession and start healing your inner world, amazing things happen.
You will find out that you can have a fun, loving and fulfilling connection to your Self and your personal spirituality.  You will have deep and loving connection with others.  You can, from this place of growing self-love,  have peace with your body and food. You will enjoy your body.
You will begin to discover your dreams and your life purpose and you will feel useful and loving and connected in the world.
It is time for this self-hatred to stop.
It is time to wake-up! To your Power, Joy, Creativity and Love.
Beginning December 1st I’ll be offering a free series on finding Peace within.  No matter what’s going on in the outer world.
If you’d like to sign-up early go here.
In the meantime, please enjoy this playlist.  Play the music loud and let yourself move.  This is one of my ways to get in the present moment and love my body.
Love,
Shannon

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I'm Shannon.  I help women get unstuck so they can live their purpose, love themselves and share their medicine with the world.

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